The Morning Grump

As soon as I see sunlight

And hear the birds that chirp

Cicadas with their buzzing

My cell phone’s timed alert

I feel my body stiffen

With stress I know so well

The new day is upon me

Oh, Morning, you are hell

My eyes, I’ll crack them open

I’ll make it out of bed

But let me warn you clearly

Bad thoughts reign in my head

Don’t even think of trying

To wish me a good day

I really do not care

Just get out of my way

So if I must wake up

And function at my best

I just want my damn coffee

I don’t say that in jest

Unless you have a pastry

Or prepped my Aeropress

You really should take cover

My anger will be less

I think there’s only one thing

To tame the rage inside

A ton of French press coffee

In a mug a mile wide

But since that is unlikely

And surely too expensive

Approach only with caution

I’ll probably be defensive

Oh, don’t you fear for me

Or worry about my fate

As I drink my coffee

My anger will abate

Just give me time and space

A Yirgacheffe brew

And certainly by lunch

My mood will be brand new

I’ll never give it up

My morning cup of joe

But if you push for it

I’ll mark you as my foe

Oh, how I love my coffee

My little morning jump

It is the only thing

To defeat the morning grump


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